Autonomy and Dependency

This got me thinking about my role as a musician and performer. When performing in front of an audience, my hope is that I am interpreting the music and telling the story in such a way that I am helping the audience solve some sort of problem, or posing a question they may not have asked themselves before. In that context of helping the audience (in whatever ways artists can), what might it look like to choose autonomy-oriented helping over dependency-oriented helping?

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Rereading

It threw into relief this truth: that what we are experiencing now, in this moment, will not last. A week or a month or four years down the road, the thing that is currently gnawing at us, or inspiring us, or frustrating us, likely won’t elicit the same response. It’s like spiritual taste buds that change over time.

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Creative Communities

For creators (i.e. everyone), it is vital to surround ourselves with those who challenge us to grow. Yes, we absolutely need people who will support us unconditionally, those who provide comfort and safety during difficult times. And we also need people who will nudge us when our work is off-base, who will cheer us on when we choose the discomfort zone, and who will consistently get down in the creative mud right next to us.

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Fixed Goals vs. Growth Strategies

Developing a growth strategy for ourselves transforms our goals, successes, and failures into data. The outcome of a particular project — whether positive or negative — informs and improves how we approach the next project, rather than defining our identity. If we are playing an infinite game — where the goal is to keep playing, rather than to win — then a growth strategy is our playbook.

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Accomplishments and Impact

Here’s a fun, start-of-year activity: for your eyes only, list all of your accomplishments from the past year. At least one accomplishment per month.

I got this exercise from Meredith Fineman’s new book, Brag Better: Master the Art of Fearless Self-Promotion. Throughout the book, she offers a wealth of ideas and exercises geared toward helping the reader acknowledge and celebrate their accomplishments by simply stating the facts of their successes and not bullshitting.

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News Intake

The fight is a marathon, not a sprint. We have to be ready to show up for the long haul and advocate for the ones we’ve spent centuries ignoring and silencing. And we can’t do that effectively or consistently if we are giving away our vitality to a constant news binge.

We must balance the acknowledgement that our ability to walk away from the news and rejuvenate is a huge privilege, with the knowledge that, if we don’t give ourselves space and time to rest, we will not be able to show up as allies for those who need us. For those who will continue to need us in the years to come.

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